Wonder how this thing works, and if it does. In life we live despite our selves or our own best interests or natural instinctual flow. In fact we spend a life time wasting what energies we have perhaps alloted maybe not, on fighting idiotic systems, those of life and it's random frustrationals, and those of human kind, through, no fault of its own, has made it nearly impossible to write a letter to someone, asking them for something, getting a response in a timely manner, and getting it sorted in a few days. Nope, the whole damned affair is a cock up tits up waste. Fuck it! Or rather, don't! Damn it all. Wish we could. Start over. With this knowledge! Ultimately nothing matters. How fucking depressing is that? That's your answer or secret message they tell you but don't tell you near the end of that Think and Grow Rich, positive mental attitude book, from way back when. Either that is the most zazen book in the world, or it as well can go to complete oblivion, like that book of books called book-bible. Don't mix linen and wool. Nonsense! What horse shit. Damn, even horse shit has more use than that advice. Nothing matters. Well, of course it does, from the scientific point of view. Hmm. Pondering on.